I'm really into asian looking animals
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
