i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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