Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Dear god my vagina.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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