R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
