Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I'm gonna fight the coyote
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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