wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
