Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
