im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize