So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
