I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
My bed smells like the plague
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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