3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
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