Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
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