i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Randomize
