the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
