yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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