On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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