The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
