there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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