Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
