We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
