When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
