So gin and wine won't be happening again
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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