I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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