Your tits are I can't wait for
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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