Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
