Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Randomize
