is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
My underwear smells like fireworks.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
