There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
