I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Randomize
