The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
