im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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