If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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