There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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