i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
