we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
