Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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