I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
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