I must be too annoying 4 u.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
