Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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