i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Randomize
