he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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