hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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