apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
My life is pants optional.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
