so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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