I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
