what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
i think im in europe. pls send help
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize