i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
