I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize