If i could tip my vagina, i would.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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