Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
