do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
