I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
