You made me cry and you don't even care
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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