porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
